When someone you care about has cancer emotional issues may make it hard for you to carry on in your everyday life. A Zen approach to cancer anxiety may help you to be able to function.

Although you are dealing with the cancer of a family member in the present, for a brief time you may decide to journey in your mind to another time. Recall an occasion in your life when you moved on from something, even if it took a very long time. You were no longer attached—this is non-attachment (or detachment), a principle of Zen philosophy. Notice how eventually you blossomed from the change, although at first you fought it. Whether cancer brings a change due to your loved one’s demise or an adjustment while they are undergoing treatment, one big challenge is learning non-attachment to that which is beyond your control. You may be detaching from a lifestyle that increases the risk of cancer to yourself, or to others through your example. You may want to let go of the role of a victim or a savior, or even a way of life. Your inner self or Higher Self will replace that which you detach from with an opportunity to find a new path in life.
You may feel the need to hang on to what you have or had, believing it is the best that will ever be. While reconsidering this belief, imagine yourself having something different, which makes you happy. Honor past memories, but without grasping onto them. Imagine the future holds greater fulfillment, in a different way, even though you might not see why right now. Make the decision to trust your instinctive drive to manifest the greater good for yourself and others.
Ask your Higher Self to assist you in detaching from anything that you have acknowledged is not for your greater good. Is there anything that seems to be leaving your life, even though you aren’t sure you want it to? Take a deep breath, close your eyes and mentally give this thing or person permission to leave you. Hanging on can repel something you want; once you release something, it will either come back to you or something better will take its place.
You can learn to cope with change calmly and peacefully, by trusting that the universe is your friend. Have you ever heard someone say about another person, “She hates the world”? They are referring to a miserable person. On the other hand, with the world as your friend, you have a trusted force for change. You may describe it as the collective unconscious, God, or anything in which you place your faith. If another voice within fights the change, God or your trusted force will bring the change which is most beneficial to you, with our without a conscious decision on your part.
The essence of non-attachment will materialize when you are pondering something in your life that seems to be contrary to your highest good:
Non-attachment comes without calling ahead, but you don’t mind, for it’s a joy to see him and gaze into his warm, familiar eyes. His visits are reliable, yet elusive. When he is on the road, there is no way to reach him, so you savor this time with him. He has a voice as clear as an azure sky on a crisp October day. You listen attentively as he shares his wisdom with you.
You may tap into non-attachment by re-reading the italicized words above; then close your eyes, imagine something which is no longer serving your greater good, and finally imagine the state of non-attachment. At this time, you may want to detach from the belief that your own happiness is not important while another suffers. This is a harsh trip to lay upon yourself. Would you demand another to feel continual guilt and sorrow? Can you treat yourself as kindly as you treat another?

Recommended Reading

Their Cancer – Your Journey by Anne Orchard
A helpful guide for family members and friends on coping with practical and emotional issues

More information helpful with Emotional Issues.

Further Cancer Book Reviews